So yesterday was Father’s Day. Happy Father’s Day to all, I hope it was all you anticipated.
I wrote, what I considered, a fine piece regarding the aforementioned Father’s Day yesterday. And promptly lost it on the device I had depended on to save it. I had depended on the device to act as I expected and was accustomed to, only to be let down.
That’s a great analogy for my relationship with my father. Over the years, I have routinely acted contrary to what was desired or expected. I frequently failed to meet the standard set forth. I let my father down.
That admission is not self pity, nor an act of false contrition. Just a mere statement of indisputable fact.
My father is a good man. He has been an exceptional provider for my step-mother and her two kids (whom he adopted). In his retirement years he has been very supportive of my step-mother as she continues to practice medicine in a clinic a couple times a week. I know my father gets great enjoyment from the grandchildren his adopted kids have brought forth. I believe he is a content and happy man.
I really hope he is. He has worked hard for his success. He deserves peace and joy.
I am not a father (to the best of my knowledge). I have had failed attempts at being a step-father and often found it is damn hard to parent someone else’s kid. Until now.
My lady’s 7 & 12 year old kids gave me a card this weekend. It’s nice, with a lovely sentiment. I quite like it. When I found out that not only was it their idea to get me a card, but that they had picked it out themselves, well, you could have dropped me with a feather. At that moment, it could have been a Bristol board with an ‘x’ scratched in it and I would have been just as moved.
It seems our wee family enjoys my company. It would appear I am loved. Maybe I’m making a positive impact.
I remember my step-dad. He was a fine man. He taught me many skills, let me ‘help’ in the garage and showed me vulnerability is ok. He accepted my failures and flaws. He got right and truly furious but never judged. He was another very good man.
Now that I see the impact I’m having on these two wee kiddies’ lives, I am resolved to use the best skills of both the fine men who have been fathers to me. I count myself fortunate to have been influenced by them both and hope I can filter their lessons to my step-kids. I want them to be happy, to enjoy their childhood, to learn to enjoy leisure, while also learning respect, duty, ethics and the value of work.
I was blessed to have the influence of two fathers, I only hope to emulate the best of them both.
Happy Father’s Day to all.